February Flowers and Feelings

Narcissus papyraceus or Paperwhites

I had difficulty finding an Amaryllis bulb for myself in December. On the rack where they used to be at the store was a single box of Paperwhite bulbs. I enjoy watching spring bulbs bloom in the winter so I purchased the Paperwhites and planted them in early January. Seven stalks are blooming as I write this post, and the members of our household have mixed feelings about their scent. 

"The naturally-produced biochemical that gives paperwhite narcissus its distinctive fragrance is indole. Not everyone likes the smell of indole – especially in large amounts. It has a sweetness that can both repel and attract us simultaneously. The biochemical compound indole is found throughout the natural world: in fecal matter, decaying animals, body odour and even in vegetables such as broccoli and kale."

Or in another online opinion,

"Paperwhite narcissus is the cilantro of the flower world. While some people can’t get enough of their heady fragrance, to others they smell like a cross between dirty socks and cat pee." (source)

I love cilantro but a coworker who lacked the genetic ability to enjoy the herb told me it tasted like soapy dirt to her tastebuds. Whose opinion is right or wrong?

Last week, one of the youngest therapists at the hospital, a lovely, energetic new grad asked me to see a patient on her unit. The patient had taken an intense dislike toward her and demonstrated it with inappropriate verbal behaviour. The therapist said to me, 

"I have never had a patient I didn't get along with!" 

She felt she could not face the patient again.

I wanted to tell her that it was sure to happen again. We cannot make everyone like us, even if our behaviour is faultless. I was happy to help her out and being forewarned, my session with the patient went well, mainly because I avoided giving commands and let the patient direct our interaction. 

Last month I had a patient who tearfully told the unit physician how much she hated me and that she didn't know why she hated me so much. I was very aware of her feelings toward me, but when the matter was discussed at team rounds, the staff members were shocked at the vehemence of her disfavour. I have learned not to take offence at incidents like this. The patient had my sympathy as I felt she chose me as the target of her frustration and unhappiness at losing control of her life due to a chronic illness. She had a severe fear of falling and my daily visits to encourage her to try walking with me turned out to be counterproductive. 

My Paperwhite Narcissus blooms are very pretty but I confess I will be not sorry when I can toss the plant in the compost. (I cannot throw a healthy, blooming plant out even if it stinks!) We keep moving the pot from place to place in the house where the smell may be less noticeable. Right now they are a daily reminder that I cannot please everyone for reasons that may be out of my control. 

Inoffensive and very neutral birthday Carnations