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| Photo by Jane Barlow, Press Association taken two days before the Queen's death |
We were at the Thursday market at St. Jacobs on the beautiful early autumn afternoon of September 8, 2022, when we heard that Queen Elizabeth II had died. Her health declined significantly since the death of Prince Philip and her bout with Covid earlier this year seemed to increase her fragility. Yet I expected she would be a centenarian like her mother. While her reign lasted a record 70 years, she influenced the world throughout her entire life.
Queen Elizabeth II has been a constant throughout our lives. She became Queen of England the month my
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| Princess Elizabeth |
husband was born and both of us have known no other monarch. My mother's family were of Empire Loyalist stock and were ardent royalists. Princess Elizabeth was a role model like an older sister for my mother, Elizabeth. My mother was six years younger and had several books about the life of the princess. Mom emulated the style and hobbies of the Princess as she grew up. The Queen and her family, as part of the Greatest Generation who lived through the great depression and World War II, linked my life to the experiences of my grandparents. She took her role very seriously and said at her Silver Jubilee,
"When I was 21, I pledged my life to the service of our people and I asked for God's help to make good that vow. Although that vow was made in my salad days, when I was green in judgement, I do not regret, or retract, one word of it."
As tributes have poured in for the Queen, I have been impressed by the adjectives used to describe her life and character. She truly lived above scandal throughout her reign. I have collected quotes that have inspired me as tributes pour in at this time of mourning.
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Rainbows over Buckingham and Windsor Castles
at the time of the Queen's death |
"She led the country through some of our greatest and darkest moments with grace and decency and genuine caring." Elton John
"(Her life) was utterly and completely devoted to the service of others...“A strong memory I will have up here is her laughter. She was extraordinary.” Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern
She was "thoughtful, wise, curious, helpful, funny and so much more. In a complicated world, her steady grace and resolve brought comfort to us all. Prime Minister Justin Trudeau
"...in an age when the public, political face of Christianity is often so loud, angry, and reactionary, her approach was implicit and gentle, based on a commitment to public service. She took Christianity extremely seriously, which is different from taking it aggressively. She was moderation and decency, even when neither quality seemed especially apparent in her own country." Michael Coren
"She was more than a monarch - she defined an era. She charmed us with her wit, moved us with her kindness, and generously shared with us her wisdom. Queen Elizabeth II was a stateswoman of unmatched dignity and constancy who deepened the bedrock of the Alliance between the United Kingdom and the United States. She helped make our relationship special. Through the noise and tumult of the years, she embodied and exhibited timeless decency and an enduring calm... " US President Joe Biden
Other general comments I read included phrases like,
" an icon of stable, responsible leadership and a beacon of morality, humanity and patriotism”.
"a beacon of wisdom and principled leadership"
"selfless and wise, with a wonderful generosity of spirit. That is how she lived – and how she led."
"elegance, tolerance, dignity, courage and devotion, warmth and kindness, a role model for leadership, great intellect, charm and wit".
"a deep sense of duty, resilience, a sense of humour and kindness."
There are those who say they cannot mourn the death of someone who represented the abuses of the British Colonial era. I would argue that Queen Elizabeth did not choose her privileged birth and did not choose or expect to be the sovereign of the British Commonwealth. She did not perpetuate the past and sought to bring healing in the present and future. As Danish philosopher, Søren Kierkegaard wrote,
"Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards."
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| @blackcoffeewithwhitefriends |
Writer Marcie Alvis Walker has an Instagram account called
Black Coffee with White Friends. She wrote a beautiful post about colonialism and Queen Elizabeth.
"How do we weep with those who weep when they mourn those who have caused millions to weep?
This is where we meet our humanity and see both the beauty and the terror and the in-between.
I’ve seen a lot of ungracious posts about Queen Elizabeth’s death. While I feel those posts are valid, I’ve wondered about those of us who are conflicted and find binary perspectives super difficult?
For many of us who are descendants of colonized ancestors, it’s difficult to mourn a person who represents a legacy of oppression.
All too often we’ve seen benefactors of the white supremacy of colonialism & imperialism become sainted in their deaths—sins erased. Their silence & complicity is spun as virtuous. The history they made washed & rewritten.
So how do we hold space for such a time as this?
Nelson Mandela said, “It is so easy to break down and destroy. The heroes are those who make peace and build." The colonizing, imperialism & scandals were easy. Too easy. The peacemaking, healing, rebuilding and reimagining are impossibly hard & heroic feats of perseverance.
There’s a story about a visit Mandela made to see the Queen. He was given a protocol full of procedures on how to address her. But upon seeing the Queen approaching, Mandela broke protocol & called out, “Elizabeth! You’ve lost weight.” She replied, "Thank you, Nelson, you don't look bad yourself!"
I realize others may not agree with this and that’s perfectly fine: I’m gonna follow Mandela’s lead and first see the human being apart from the institution that caged her. And I’m going to weep with Prince Harry & Meghan Markle and my Hobbiton-husband and his family.
But most of all, I am going to remember the woman who had tea with Paddington Bear & pulled a marmalade sandwich from her purse like Beyoncé might pull hot sauce from her bag.
Tomorrow, I will work to dismantle the supremacy that bonded her life to mine—neither demonizing nor idolizing her life. Instead, I will see it for the beauty that it was & also its terror. And I’ll extend mercy, knowing that someday when my time has come, I’d like someone to mercifully weep, despite all that’s terrible within me."
I am inspired to live out the attributes that others saw in our Monarch during her long reign. No matter how rich or poor, privileged or humble we may be, character counts for everything. Princess Elizabeth as a young woman asked God to help her fulfill her vow of service to her subjects, and her prayer was answered.
