Perspective Taking

Our granddaughter played hide and go seek at the park and would have kept the game up all afternoon. Her delight at being found or finding someone else was fresh with each round. For a child, figuring out where someone is hiding is an exercise in problem-solving, working memory and perspective taking.

Perspective taking is the ability to understand a situation from the point of view of another person. In children, it starts with understanding a different physical perspective. The dog is lying on her mat to my right. The person on the other side of the room sees the dog to her left. 

We were watching llamas and alpacas at the same park with the children. One animal moved behind a shed and our 2-year-old grandson was upset that he couldn't see it anymore. He did not realize that if he walked three metres to the right he would have a different sight line and would be able to see the llama. I had to show him how to do this but he will likely remember in the future. 

Cognitive and social perspective taking is the ability to see things from another person's point of view. Children are very egocentric and it takes time and exposure to different social settings and human interactions for them to recognize that feelings, thoughts and attitudes vary from person to person. A child who is helped to see something from another viewpoint is more empathetic and sociable and performs better in group problem-solving situations. 

Sadly, some adults remain inflexibly self-centred and are not skilled at seeing issues from another's point of view.  Storytelling is a good way to share another perspective. Reading books by Indigenous authors and stories of immigrants to North America and Europe has improved my understanding of how their experiences have shaped their worldview. 

I just read Think Again by Adam Grant. The introduction states,

"...in a rapidly changing world, there's another set of cognitive skills that might matter more: the ability to rethink and unlearn. In our daily lives, too many of us favour the comfort of conviction over the discomfort of doubt. We listen to opinions that make us feel good, instead of ideas that make us think hard. We see disagreement as a threat to our egos, rather than an opportunity to learn. We surround ourselves with people who agree with our conclusions when we should gravitate toward those who challenge our thought process. The result is that our beliefs get brittle long before our bones."

I found the concepts and stories in the book to be fascinating. The author states that people who remain curious and open to change have less anxiety in life.

I also finished Rich Villodas' new book Good and Beautiful and Kind this week. I purchased my own copy so I could underline and re-read it. He gives a spiritual view of why we hold on to our hurts and why we put up walls when others do not share our opinions and perspectives. 

Several years ago I attended a Hearing Voices workshop. All the participants were given earbuds and an MP3 device that played a soundtrack of the inner voices that plague a schizophrenic's mind. We were given a set of tasks to complete while listening to the voices such as ordering a drink at the cafeteria and asking a stranger for directions. The voices were sometimes kind but would shout threatening and demeaning accusations at other times. The distraction was hard to deal with while trying to perform everyday tasks. The experience was far more effective than listening to a lecture or reading about schizophrenia and I will not forget the perspective on schizophrenia I gained that day.

The children will achieve the developmental milestones that allow them to comprehend physical and emotional/social perspectives. All of us must work to ensure that we continue to explore and recognize the different perspectives and experiences of people around us.