Family

Our grandchildren with their friend

The Gospel reading and sermon today was from Mark chapter 3 where the mother and brothers of Jesus accused him of being mad. They had come to collect and take him home to preserve their family honour.

When his family heard about this, they went to take charge of (Jesus), for they said, “He is out of his mind.” Mark 3:21

Too often, the people we disagree with and judge the most are family members. It may start with sibling rivalry, childhood selfishness or parental favouritism. We may not like a particular in-law or disapprove of choices made by a grown child.

It is easy to make prideful judgements and fire off rude comments and accusations to those closest to us. There are instances where estrangement from a family member is essential for moving forward when there is a history of abusive behaviour, unfaithfulness or negligence. But most family conflicts centre on petty annoyances and misunderstandings. We come to a discussion table with firm opinions and pre-judgements that prevent us from listening to a different point of view. Even when people make bad choices and mistakes, correction should be accompanied by grace and humility. If our advice is ignored, we can still offer love and support.

Family history is important in understanding the traits we see in future generations. The losses, traumas, and estrangements of the past do pursue us. A recent Ancestry.com poll found that over half of the Americans questioned did not know the names of all four grandparents. Cultural and generational shifts have occurred rapidly in my lifetime with some people embracing change while others push back.

I have recorded some family history and little memories of my life in this blog, putting my opinions and observations forward even when others disagree. Much of my life was unduly influenced by fear of what others would think of me. I want to be authentic, honest and unafraid to voice my questions and doubts. I used to know all the right answers but the older I am, the less I know. Listening is more important than speaking my piece.

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others.

Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.

Don’t look out only for your own interests,

but take an interest in others, too. Philippians 2:3-4

Of course, I will close with some observations from nature as I continue to watch birds raising their young. Family...family...family.